Here's a quick quiz. Think back to when you were in senior high school. What were your favorite classes? Can you recall two or three of the lessons? How about the teacher? My guess is that information concerning the lesson material is pretty sparse compared to recollections concerning the teacher. Congratulations! You have just proved to yourself why you are the most important part of the youth ministries program. It's not that all the lessons you teach are unimportant, but that they become important only as they are interpreted through the life of someone significant. Youth ministries is the word of God made into flesh through pastors, advisors, and other young people. It is through people that the great "I love you" of God is heard. Forget the gimmicks, curriculums, philosophies, and all the program ideas you have ever heard. You are the program. Youth ministries exists only to put advisors and young people into significant relationships. If your program helps that to happen, great! If not, you're kidding yourself.

Contact Work

How do you go about establishing significant relationships with young people? One of the most effective ways I know is "contact work."

• Contact work is personal. It says "I care about you" face to face, away from the pre-planned program.
• Contact work is intentional. It's always wonderful to find yourself alone with a young person or two. Contact work seeks to create those opportunities.
• Contact work is accessible. The responsibility of communicating "I care about you" belongs to the messenger, not the recipient. That often means we meet young people on their turf, or at least on their terms.

Young Life coined the phrase "earning the right to be heard." There is certainly enough truth in that phrase alone to justify nurturing contact work skills. But it is only half the story. By being intentionally and personally accessible to young people, you not only "earn the right to be heard" but "learn to hear rightly." More than all the classes, books, magazines, and seminars on "youth trends," contact work will tell you what is going on with young people. You will be privy to the real hurts and joys of the people who walk through your door week after week. Suddenly, planning the rest of your program becomes much easier and more effective.

Here are a few ideas that are proven winners when it comes to letting young people know that you care about them.

Mutual Interests

The easiest contact work revolves around mutual interests. Activities like racquetball, golf, biking, photography, shopping, concerts, movies, record hunting, and going to the gym all qualify. Some mutual interests need to be cultivated. One advisor I know purchased an old car and invited a couple of guys to help him restore it. They had a whole summer of fun and quality contact time. The car looked pretty good too! That is an extreme example. Good contact work doesn't need to be that involved. Look to your own special interests and see where you might be able to use them as a bridge for establishing contact.

School Campus

Another type of contact work involves getting on the school campus. This is where young people spend more time and energy than anywhere else next to home, and school is often more influential. Why not put yourself in their world for a while? Going to athletic events, plays, graduations, and competitions lets young people know that they are important to you for more than the chair they fill at church. Going to events that young people participate in clearly communicates your care. Some people's schedules allow them to go on campus to share an occasional lunch, speak to a class, or volunteer as a tutor, assistant coach, or even in the PTA.

Fast Food

One of my favorite contact activities is simply taking young people out for a meal at a fast food restaurant. Who could resist? (No one has!) A beverage and the easy atmosphere at a fast food restaurant have set the stage for some fantastic discussions. We have talked about everything from school, movies, videos, and parents to suicide, sexuality, and faith (or lack of it). "Going out for a Coke" has become almost an institution at some congregations.

Telephone

Time is limited, of course, and you can't be with everyone all the time. There are ways of making contact without "being there." The telephone is a great tool for contact work, and you are probably using it already. Try adding a "contact log." Each young person gets a separate page in the log, and each time we talk, important details (everything from upcoming math tests to custody hearing times) are recorded with the date of the call. The next time we talk, I am able to refer back to our last conversation and the person knows he or she is important. It takes a lot of discipline and effort to keep a contact log going, but all you need, to know it is all worth it, is the sound of appreciation in someone's voice because you remembered. Besides that, it makes a great prayer list.

Mail

Everyone likes to get mail, especially young people. Birthdays, confirmations, and graduations are natural excuses for a quick note. Young people who are away at school feel very cared for when they get a postcard from home (other than Moms!). Sometimes there are things you want to express to someone, but there never seems to be the right time or place to say it. Letters and e-mail are the perfect medium for that kind of contact.

"Walls of Fame"

All these are ideas to get you into the youth world. Try getting young people into your world by making yourself and the congregation more accessible. One day I got tired of looking at the planning calendars and calling lists on my office walls. I took them all down and began covering my walls with pictures of our young people and their activities. I must have two hundred pictures now on my "Walls of Fame," and young people are always dropping by to see if there are any new pictures and to look at old ones of themselves. Besides being a lively place to work, my office has also become a great point of contact.

Those are just a few suggestions. You probably could come up with as many ideas of your own. Contact work is an art. It takes awhile to find the best approach so that your personality and your unique style of ministry come through. Take the time to develop it. It's the most effective way I know to minister to the needs of young people and let them know they are valued.